On Waving Rights

وَأَن تَعۡفُوٓاْ أَقۡرَبُ لِلتَّقۡوَىٰۚ وَلَا تَنسَوُاْ ٱلۡفَضۡلَ بَيۡنَكُمۡۚ…

…Waiving [your right] is nearer to godliness, so do not forget to be generous towards one another…

-Surah Al-Baqarah, Ayah 237

We should come to marriage with this ayah in mind. We don’t spend time talking about women’s responsibilities towards us or frequent alqahs that do. Rather, we focus on leading, doing our responsibilities, being generous with our time, attention, money and all. We don’t let the demands of every day life or society’s rigid gender expectations make us lose sight of the need to be caring, loving, compassionate and generous to our wives.

In this deep and beautiful ayah God reminds of an important aspect of positive living, closer to piety. We’re not about what people ought to do for us. We focus on what we do for people. We’re people of beautiful manners.


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